~Trying to Impress~

       


              ~Notice the tree standing alone~


Most of us spend a great portion of our lives trying to impress others. The way we look, dress, speak, work, walk, etc. We spend more time looking to please, than to be pleased just being who we are. We attempt to change our personality, to be accepted. Instead, you should just be the best you, that you can be, regardless of anyone else's perception of you.

Whenever anyone try to be perfect, behind the effort lies a desperate need to be accepted. It is this same need that often drives us to take on more than we should. In trying to be perfect we work on the quality of our activities, crafts, jobs, positions, etc: Silent questions to ourselves are: Was that good enough? Did I impress them with how well I did that? Will they acknowledge my potential and my worth? Did they like the way I looked in that dress or suit?

In taking on too much, we stress ourselves and the quality of what we do. Another question, Did I do enough? We should never stress ourselves to please another. You excel by embracing who you are and acknowledging your true potential in being the best you.

In closing and please hear this: Some people are judged instantly by their clothes, their cars, their appearance, their race, their education, their social status. The list goes on and on. What sometimes frustrates me personally is that most people decide who another person is even before they speak to them. What's even worse, these same people decide who and what the status of someone else is, and don't even know who they are themselves.

We must cease forming opinions of someone before we get to know them and we must cease to live our lives based on others opinions/perceptions of us. Again, just be the best person that God has preordain  us (you) to be; Whether anyone approves or not. And, viewing the picture above, this also means, sometimes you must stand alone!

*Dare To Be Different*
~Have the courage~

Remember, if you cease to be you, then who's going to be you?

~These are my thoughts ... I welcome yours~

~From The Heart~

In life, I truly believe, at least once, you will find that special someone, who can completely turn your life and world around. You are able to tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more.

You share hopes for the future, dreams that may or may not ever come true, goals that were accomplished and goals that were never achieved,  and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement.

They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you aren't good enough, but rather they build you up and show you things about yourself that make you special and help you to see what a beautiful person you truly are.

There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you, because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk, become invaluable treasures and a  keep safe in your heart to cherish forever.

Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid. It’s like being young again. Colors seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter and excitement seems part of daily life, where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. That person can even make you laugh at yourself, when in the past you couldn't.

A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you.

You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like the color of a day,  a movie, a familiar image, a painting, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible.

You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate that will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.

And, even if they don't remain, be thankful that you had the opportunity just to know them  

~These are my thoughts ... I welcome yours~

                             

~Deception~

We often say that the world if full of deceptions, and it truly is. But, so are we. The problem is, we don't see how deceived we are and how we deceive ourselves. Life shouldn't be as complicated as we make it. We stress ourselves out over foolish things that we think are vital to our survival. When, if we could stop, get quiet within, and think for a moment on what is truly important in life; I believe we would have lest diseases, sicknesses,  frustrations, angers, selfishness, criticisms, anxieties and stresses.

You see, most of our thought processes are kind of selfish. Don't get me wrong; strive to do your best, always. But know this, when God has something in store for you, it is not accompanied by anxiety or stress. Why? Because every good and perfect gift that God gives, comes from Him. And, it is acquired in peace, calmness and filled with joy!

Yes, we seek to obtain all that the world has. A reputation. Firstly we want others to know who we are. Secondly, a high position. Because we want power and money. Thirdly, relationships. But when relationships are obtained independently of God, it can lead you into ruin. Fourthly, wealth and so forth. Again, wealth obtain without wisdom can lead anyone into doom. It can give you a false sense of power and can lead to undesirable problems. The heart wants what it wants and in some instances, it will do whatever it can to obtain it's desires.

Deception: Beguilement, deceit, bluff, mystification and subterfuge are acts to propagate beliefs of things that are not true, or not the whole truth (as in half truth).

Listen, you may or may not believe this statement, but  without God the heart does not know how to avoid deception, manipulation, or the art of control; although it can produce all the words in action that were just mention. The Bible states: "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it? (Jeremiah 17:9)


Life is too short to be bogged down with the things I've mentioned. Seek peace, honesty, integrity. Deception can not only destroy those you attempt to deceive; it can also destroy you. Make up your mind. I hope this writing has place you at the crossroads of making a decision not to deceive or allow yourself to be deceived.

Note: There is another form of deception, and maybe we will discuss that in the very near future.

~These are my thoughts ... I  welcome yours~

~The Weight of Memory~

Life is huge and displays many signs that leads us in different directions. Some signs are straight forward and others directs to detours before getting to our desired destinations. Moving forward, some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. But, there are times when it takes more strength to know when to let go and then do it.

Life has a way of going in circles. Ideally, it would and should be a straight forward path ... We should always know where we are going, We should always be able to move forward and if necessary, leave detrimental things behind. If, we were able to do this, there would be nothing but the present and future. Instead, many of us constantly find ourselves where we started. When we try to move forward, we end up taking a step backwards. We carry everything with us, the weight of memories weighing us down, tiring us out, until we collapse and give up.

We forget things we try to remember. We remember things we'd rather forget. The most scary thing about memory is that it leaves no choice. It has mastered an incomprehensible art of forgetting. It erases, it distorts, it fills in blank spaces with details that don't and may never have existed.

But we remember it --- or choose to remember it. I've learned that the past is the foundation that holds our lives in place. Without its support, we would have nothing for guidance. We spend so much time focusing on what lies ahead, when what has fallen behind is just as important. Part of what defines us is not where we are going, but where we've been.

There are places and people we will never see again, and even though we move on and let them go or try too, they will forever, remain a part of who we are!

there are things that will never change, things we will carry with us as long as we live. But as we move forward and experience a cloudy, unsure future, we must find strength by learning to leave some things behind,

Listen, many of us want to believe in fairy tales and happy endings, but life is not always that way... Therefore, whatever memories and things you are holding on too, but realize that you need to let go; try and let go soon and Live, Always Love and Forever Laugh...

I hope this makes sense. As always, I welcome any and all comments.

~These are my thoughts ... I welcome yours~ 

~Finding your Purpose~,

Psalm 139: 15 lets us know that God knows us inside and out. He knew you and me before we were ever conceive.

The world is a beautiful place, with beautiful scenery, and beautiful people. And everything that God made has a purpose. Which included every part of your body. If you don't believe, then injure a part of your body that you think is insignificant and you will see exactly what mean. This is because everything God has created fits like a puzzle!

You and I have a purpose in this life. However long we have to live on this side, we have a purpose! And, if you are going to discover how God wants to use your life and work, then you must understand and know why you were created. If you start trying to determine your purpose in life before understanding why you were created, you will inevitably get hung up on the things you do as the basis for fulfillment in your life, which will only lead to frustration and disappointment.

First of all, God created you (us) to know Him and to have an intimate relationship with Him. In fact, God says that if a man is going to boast about anything in life, "boast about this: that he (You and I) understand and know Me" (God), (Jeremiah 9:24). Man kind's relationship with God was lost when Adam and Eve sinned in the garden. Jesus' death on the cross, however, allowed us to restore this relationship with God and to have an intimate fellowship with Him.

The apostle Paul came to understand this when he said, "he gave up himself and all that he had to know Christ personally, and to experience Christ's resurrection power, to be a partner in His suffering, and go all the way with Him to death itself". Please read (Philippians 3:10).

I learned this definition of a christian back in 1974-75. "A Christian is one who has been taken into that secret by the personal experience of redemption. It's life is a centering around the Cross of God in Christ. It's characteristic or likeness is that we too must be crucified and live only that life hide with Christ in God." You (I) must die to who we are; that is the only way we can live and endure this christian life. (Galatians 2:20).

Lastly, establishing this relationship with God is vital to understanding your purpose. if you don't have this relationship with God, you will seek to fulfill your purpose out of wrong motives, such as insecurity, pride, money, relationships, guilt, or anger.  The list goes on and on, never reaching a resolved state.

God's desire for you and I is to be motivated out of love for Him.  To worship Him. To know His Resurrection Power in your life. As you develop your relationship with God, He will begin to reveal His purpose for your life to you. Be patient and trust the Holy Spirit's guidance!

God said:
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord"(Jeremiah 29:11)

You have a unique purpose. Ask God to help you discover it.

I wrote this because I was compelled to do so. God's word will never return unto Him Void.

~These are my thoughts ... I welcome yours~

~A Mother's Heart~

How can we truly explain a mother's heart, a mother's unconditional love. She's kind, patient, enduring, compassionate, AMAZING! Still words cannot justify her worth.

The heart of a mother is immeasurable, which you will always fine help and forgiveness! I vividly remember my father, He was kind, caring and he provided I assume the best he knew how. My father would oftentimes bring home treats for us to eat. My father was a major figure in our home, and when he left it devastated me. He and I never really talked about serious things. He left our home when I was 13 years old.

My mother was there. And although I did't appreciate some things that she did, she was still there. She kept us together in the hardest of times. Yes, there were times when we didn't know what we were going to eat, but she was still there. There were times I saw her crying, praying and asking God to provide food for her children (us). Needless to say, God provided. I believe mothers are divine and magical. They can soothe any pain and can comfort beyond measure. A mother's heart is a vast and glorious thing.

A mother is the truest friend we have. When trials and burdens are heavy, when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends desert us; when trouble and sickness surrounds us, still, she will cling to us, and by her love, wisdom and counsel, she will do her best to cause the clouds in our lives to dissipate or go away, and ensure that peace will return to our hearts.

A mother will stay up until the late hours at night till the wee hours of the morning praying,looking and waiting for her child to come home. She will give you her last just so you will have.  And, she will always PRAY!

I've still not expressed the worth and value of a mother. How can I? How can I truly describe  mother's heart? Remember, it's immeasurable. The worsts of criminals were put to death and their mother's heart still yearns for them to be here, even after their most vicious crimes.

I have not scratched the surface...

~A Mother's Heart~

~These are my thoughts ... I welcome yours~

...~ Where Are We Headed? ~...

 

Paradox: is a statement that apparently contradicts itself and yet might be true ( or wrong at the same time).  

More people are able to attend colleges, obtaining more degrees, but they are not wiser.We've increased our knowledge, but our decision making and judgment has a lot to be desired. The world has more professionals, better doctors and nurses, monstrous hospitals with the best and most up to date equipment, and we now have better medicines, yet people are sicker and the medications have so many side effects, until you can simply die from the side effects after taking the medications.

We talk of needing more exercise, we build state of the art exercise equipment, and we take pills to lose weight. Have we not become more lazy? But, in our minds we have become more active. I'm sure you've seen exercise equipment advertised on T.V. that allows to sit in comfort while you exercise. (AMAZING)... Where are we headed?

We watch advertisements on TV, we see creams and gels to make us look younger because we are in fear of aging. We are more concerned with the way our bodies look when people are looking at us. Yes, we want and desire fine bodies, beautiful faces, great hair and we reached to achieve it by any means necessary. But, we forget our purpose and how corrupt our hearts have become.

We've gone to school, acquired a good education to make a very good living, but our lives as a whole has fallen apart. Relationships have crumbled, communication with in those relationships have become silent. Yet, we make more money to buy what we want and less of what we need.  We travel to wherever we like. Take cruises, fly to different countries,  but we never think of walking across the street to meet and say hello to an old or a new neighbor. 

May I ask a question? Are we truly better off? Are we truly living more free today or in more bondage? What are we becoming?

Our lives are fast pace, consisting of microwavable foods and the thought of me, myself and I. We've become more selfish, self-centered and less compassionate for others. And, if we are compassionate we fail to express it.

Remember, to spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever. Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in amazement, because that little person soon will grow up and not be around.

Remember, to give a direct look in the eye and warm hug to the ones you love.

Remember, to say, "I love you" to your friends and loved ones, and really mean it. You will be surprised of how much it means to a person when you ask them, can I help you with anything? Or are you really okay? Do you need to talk? We've drifted so far from showing kindness and concern.

Be willing to give good sound advise. Take ownership of situations you can handle.Remember to always be kind and loving. But, know when to be a woman and a  man of steel and velvet.

Let me explain: 
understand when to express steel = Firmness, Strength and straight forwardness.
understand when to express velvet=Tenderness, Love and sensitivity.

Maybe this song will enlighten you. Please listen to the words! Just copy and paste.

https://youtu.be/GGQmKA15VCk

~These are my thoughts ... (Not the song) ... I welcome yours~

~You Decide ~

Love is a force that no one can contain. It is an untamed force that completes each of us in different ways. And, sometimes when you try to understand it, it can leave you lost and confused. You forgive those who hurt you, you still care for the one who dismantled your heart, and you still reminisce about the good times you had together. You find yourself listening and thinking in silence about that person, and that silence can be so loud until you can feel the very beat of your heart.

Human nature dictates that we should dislike the person who has hurt us, but love says to forgive and to reach out to them, even though they deeply hurt you. Love is a miraculous force that is sometimes unexplainable.

When you  deeply care for someone, it's like planning a vacation. You plan everything out carefully. And, one day you make a wrong turn. There is a detour and you end up in some crazy place where even a map can't get you out (back to each other). It hits you gradually, you're lost. Part of you is hurting, part of you is angry and part of you still cares for that person.

Then there's the solitude segment. Solitude can bring out the worst in you. It gives you time to think, think and think on the nature of things. Allows you time to examine what went wrong, what happened.

It is so strange how someone can be an intricate part of one's life one day and be gone the next. But, if you are going to be honest, truly honest with yourself, then realize that there were signs indicating something was wrong. Not in all cases but I can almost promise you in most. I often make this statement:  A man will always show you who he is, if you open your eyes and heart to see.   Go ahead, reminisce. Think about the good times, fool yourself and forget about the bad times. And I'm sure there were a few bad times. And the few bad times hurt and cut you deeply.

I believe no one should maintain a relationship that is detrimental to their mental, physical, and emotional health. It's unhealthy.  A man and woman has the right to choose who they want in their lives. And, that person may not be you. It does come a time when moving on is in order. Endure the memories, pain, hurt and disappointment. But, life moves forward, the clock of time does not fail to tick, tick, tick.  There is a question: "How long does the pain lasts?

The answer, the pain will last as long as you allow it too. The power is yours! The power is in your control. You control what your heart feels. The pain that you allow in your heart, the pain that you hold on to, is all in your control.

This choice is your yours. I know this is easier said than doing. But the statement still holds true: The choice is still yours. That time table is in your control.

It's safe to walk forward and not backwards. When you spend your efforts looking back, you just might miss the gift that God has placed in front of you.

Review the picture above. There is always a rainbow after a storm. But sometimes we miss it by looking back and holding on to pain.

I hope this makes sense. If it does, then choose to look forward and Live, Love and Laugh like you were dying.

~These are my thoughts ... I welcome yours~

What are you looking for?

Some of us spend  a portions of our lives looking for the reason as to why things should change. And, the other portion of our lives trying to make things remain the same.

We spend hours thinking of how things might have been. We wrestle in our minds wondering should I have done this or that. What if I didn't do that? We spend hours trying to bring what we call the good times back again.

Sometimes our lives seem to be in order.  We are living a typical life style. Things in our home are almost perfect to us. We have routines in place, with no thoughts of interruptions. Then all of a sudden something happens out of the ordinary.

During these times so much is going in our minds, and we get confused, we feel so much hurt, pain and sometime anger. A life-style that was once in order is suddenly in chaos and disarray.

But, these times are design to make us strong. We must fight to look beyond our circumstances to see the rainbow behind the clouds. Usually after a major storm God has a way of rewarding us with a beautiful element of surprise. There are lessons lessons to learn when we go through hurt, pain and the loss of someone we love. Once the pain subsides and we began to see clearly, we then understand that God has a plan for lives and He is directing us in the path He has pre-ordained.

We must learn to thank Him even when we can't see nor understand His purpose!!!

Each of us have a destiny. Each of us will no doubt reach our destiny in different ways. Sometimes our destiny is obtained through pain and disappointment. I hope you hear this. God sometimes allows pain to ignite destiny in our lives. We must learn how to Praise and Thank Him even though we don't understand!

 All of us have a had a measure of disappointments to invade our lives. These disappointments can create depths of pain that make our tomorrow unbearable.

Our first motivation is to alleviate the pain and disappointments. And, sometimes we do this by drinking, sleeping, working or simply making our selves busy.  Even acting as though we are okay and trying to prove to others that we are strong. We see ourselves in a place we never thought we would be. Then after a season of extreme and sometimes emotional hurt and pain, a second phase begins. This phase should move us to discover a new and deeper  relationship with God.

Once we start seeing the rainbow through all the disappointment and pain, we will begin to discover things about ourselves and about God we never knew. Gradually, there is a calm. We've endured the storm. Our minds, and attitudes switches to a willingness to move forward. We move from pain and disappointment to loving peace and contentment.  Because there is a transition of the heart that takes place.

Understand, there is a process called refining when it comes to Purifying gold. Once that process is completed, you will see a beautiful piece of jewelry. Keep trusting, keep fighting, persevere, because hard, bad, painful, and disappointing times don't last forever.

Truly God can move you from a place of Pain to a place of calm and peace. There are so many secret things God has reserved for you as a result of the crisis you may find yourself in.

Lastly, please remember; your tears, pain and circumstances does not move God. What moves God on your behalf is your faith in Him and His ability to pull you up. That's the honest truth.

~God is purifying you~

...So seek his face - Endure - Persevere ... Never allow yourself to engage in a pity party...

~These are my thoughts ... I welcome yours~

~Letting Go~

“If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. … We need not wait to see what others do.” - Gandhi 

~Decisions ... Decision~

Sometimes it's very difficult to make decisions or changes. Sometime we feel the need to make our changes or decisions after we see what others do. This shouldn't be the case. We should be strong enough to make decisions that will benefit us as individuals. I honestly do not think that is a selfish statement. There is a cliche' which states: "To thine own self be true."I believe you should always be true and honest with yourself. In doing so, you may hurt others, but you as an individual must b free to live your life in peace, harmony, fulfillment, and completeness.

I'm not a counselor nor am I trying to be Dr. Phil. I'm just writing from my heart,

Relationships can be difficult. And, it can be very difficult to leave a long term relationship, even when your inner wisdom tells you it's time to let go. Listen, you can choose to let go and endure the pain of leaving behind the familiar to make way for a new chapter in your life, Or, you can stay and suffer pain that slowly eats away at your heart and soul, like an emotional cancer. Until you awaken one day and realize that you are buried in a dysfunctional relationship. You owe it to yourself to know when to let go.

Listen, there is a difference between saying goodbye and letting go. Goodbye is permanent. However, letting go is okay with never seeing this person ever again ... being okay with with never knowing how their life turned out; because you have made a conscious decision to let go and free yourself. It does not mean you no longer care. It simply means it's time for you to move on and live. You may never fully get over this person and that is okay as long as you live your life.

Time doesn't necessarily heals all wounds. But, it  affords you the opportunity to overcome and live in spite of the pain of letting go the one you once loved and may still love.

Sometimes the strongest thing you will ever do is let go of someone you love. But if they are  not fully completing and fulfilling your life, then it's time to let go. Yes, it may be painful, you may suffer guilt, and you may second guess yourself, but for your own sanity and quality of life, the decision to let go may be right for you. 

Don't look back, move forward and walk to your freedom.

~I hope this was an enlightenment for you~

When God Seems Far Away

"Why, O Lord, do You stand far off? Why do You hide Yourself in times of trouble?" - Psalms 10:1 

One of the great mysteries of God is His ways. Some of His ways almost appear to bring us into the most difficult places, as if He were indifferent to our circumstances. It would appear that He is turning His head from our sorrows.

These events in our lives have a particular objective to perform for us. That objective is to bring us to the end of ourselves that we might discover the treasure of darkness. "Yet when I hoped for good, evil came; when I looked for light, then came darkness" (Job 30:26). When we are taken into these dark periods, we begin to see light that we never knew existed. Our sensitivities become heightened and our ability to see through spiritual eyes is illuminated. Unless we are taken into these times, our souls never develop any depth of character.

We do not gain wisdom, only knowledge. Knowledge is gained through understanding; wisdom is gained through the experience of darkness and by asking. After we go through these periods, we discover that God was, in fact, with us all along. Therefore, we walk by faith and not by sight. Meaning, it doesn't matter what we do not see, or what we feel; we must learn to trust God promptly.

He is there walking with us. He has told us countless times that He will never leave us nor forsake us. When we are in those dark periods, we can't rely on feelings. We must rely on fact that God's word is true. Faith, I believe that God's word is true. My feeling are a result of the fact accompanied by my faith in God. He does not always rescue us from the circumstances. Sometimes we will have to go through them.

He does this for our benefit in order that we might become more like Jesus. Jesus learned obedience from the things He suffered (see Hebrew. 5:8). What does that say about how you and I will learn obedience? Embrace the dark times and gain the wisdom that God has in store for you during these times.

Again: Our circumstances do not move God. Our faith is the ingredient that get God into action.

~These are my thoughts ... I welcome yours~