~Letting Go~

“If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. … We need not wait to see what others do.” - Gandhi 

~Decisions ... Decision~

Sometimes it's very difficult to make decisions or changes. Sometime we feel the need to make our changes or decisions after we see what others do. This shouldn't be the case. We should be strong enough to make decisions that will benefit us as individuals. I honestly do not think that is a selfish statement. There is a cliche' which states: "To thine own self be true."I believe you should always be true and honest with yourself. In doing so, you may hurt others, but you as an individual must b free to live your life in peace, harmony, fulfillment, and completeness.

I'm not a counselor nor am I trying to be Dr. Phil. I'm just writing from my heart,

Relationships can be difficult. And, it can be very difficult to leave a long term relationship, even when your inner wisdom tells you it's time to let go. Listen, you can choose to let go and endure the pain of leaving behind the familiar to make way for a new chapter in your life, Or, you can stay and suffer pain that slowly eats away at your heart and soul, like an emotional cancer. Until you awaken one day and realize that you are buried in a dysfunctional relationship. You owe it to yourself to know when to let go.

Listen, there is a difference between saying goodbye and letting go. Goodbye is permanent. However, letting go is okay with never seeing this person ever again ... being okay with with never knowing how their life turned out; because you have made a conscious decision to let go and free yourself. It does not mean you no longer care. It simply means it's time for you to move on and live. You may never fully get over this person and that is okay as long as you live your life.

Time doesn't necessarily heals all wounds. But, it  affords you the opportunity to overcome and live in spite of the pain of letting go the one you once loved and may still love.

Sometimes the strongest thing you will ever do is let go of someone you love. But if they are  not fully completing and fulfilling your life, then it's time to let go. Yes, it may be painful, you may suffer guilt, and you may second guess yourself, but for your own sanity and quality of life, the decision to let go may be right for you. 

Don't look back, move forward and walk to your freedom.

~I hope this was an enlightenment for you~

When God Seems Far Away

"Why, O Lord, do You stand far off? Why do You hide Yourself in times of trouble?" - Psalms 10:1 

One of the great mysteries of God is His ways. Some of His ways almost appear to bring us into the most difficult places, as if He were indifferent to our circumstances. It would appear that He is turning His head from our sorrows.

These events in our lives have a particular objective to perform for us. That objective is to bring us to the end of ourselves that we might discover the treasure of darkness. "Yet when I hoped for good, evil came; when I looked for light, then came darkness" (Job 30:26). When we are taken into these dark periods, we begin to see light that we never knew existed. Our sensitivities become heightened and our ability to see through spiritual eyes is illuminated. Unless we are taken into these times, our souls never develop any depth of character.

We do not gain wisdom, only knowledge. Knowledge is gained through understanding; wisdom is gained through the experience of darkness and by asking. After we go through these periods, we discover that God was, in fact, with us all along. Therefore, we walk by faith and not by sight. Meaning, it doesn't matter what we do not see, or what we feel; we must learn to trust God promptly.

He is there walking with us. He has told us countless times that He will never leave us nor forsake us. When we are in those dark periods, we can't rely on feelings. We must rely on fact that God's word is true. Faith, I believe that God's word is true. My feeling are a result of the fact accompanied by my faith in God. He does not always rescue us from the circumstances. Sometimes we will have to go through them.

He does this for our benefit in order that we might become more like Jesus. Jesus learned obedience from the things He suffered (see Hebrew. 5:8). What does that say about how you and I will learn obedience? Embrace the dark times and gain the wisdom that God has in store for you during these times.

Again: Our circumstances do not move God. Our faith is the ingredient that get God into action.

~These are my thoughts ... I welcome yours~

~The myth and Devastation of War~

If we really saw war, what war does to the young minds and bodies, it would be impossible to embrace the myth of war. Yet, wars have been a part of our world's system since the beginning of time. There have been and are religious wars, economical wars, family wars and we can go on and on,

If we had to look at mingled corpses of school children killed in wars all over this world and listen to the cries of mother's, father's and families members, we would not be able to repeat the cliches' we use to justify war.

Cliche':
A phrase or opinion that is overused and betrays a lack of original thought.

This is why war is carefully sanitized. Another phrase would be to say it this way: We make wars appealing by eliminating anything that doesn't justify our cause of action, This is why we are given war's perverse and dark thrill but are spared from seeing war's consequences. The mythic visions of war keep it heroic and entertaining...

Mythic: Unreal - lacking in reality or substance or genuineness; not corresponding to acknowledge facts or criteria.

The wounded, cripple, and the dead are in this great charade, swiftly carted offstage. They are war's refuse. We do not see them. We do not hear them or care to hear them. They are doomed, like wandering spirits, to float around the edges of our consciousness, ignored, even reviled.

Reviled:
Contemptuous language in speaking to or about; call bad names.

Have you ever seen an injured/wounded soldier walk into a restaurant, body mingled to the point of someone saying "why are they letting him/her in here? I can't eat around them. Well, this is so sad, Truth  be told, I didn't speak that out loud, but I've thought it in my heart. And yes, SHAME on ME!!!. But I thank God for changing my attitude and my outlook to the point of my readiness and willingness to assist by holding the door or assisting to help them get seated and offering to pay for their meal out of appreciation and not pity for them,

Oh God, wars are terrible, but in some instances necessary!

The message they tell is to painful for us to hear. We prefer to celebrate ourselves and our Nation by imbibing the myths of glory, honor, patriotism, and heroism. Words that in combat become empty and meaningless.

Imbibing: To absorb or soak up.

This is sad to say, but the terror we give in war, is the terror we get! ... I back that statement with this quote; "Whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap."

~These are my thoughts ... I welcome yours~

~ When Indecisive~

If you’re indecisive, making decisions can be difficult. When you finally make a decision, you may not be confident about it, or you might change your mind.

My niece inspired me to write this. Sometime ago I was watching her. My niece is a very jovial young woman, and she is very positive. But on this particular day her facial expression and body language told me something was wrong.

So, before I left her presence I ask, "Toi, are you okay?". Her reply was "I'm okay UB (Uncle Bernie). I'm just faced with making a decision. I did not press her to tell me what the decision was. Instead I said to her, "Toi, I sense something is wrong and whatever decision you need to make, do nothing until you see the hand God in your decision".

I went to the book of Numbers, chapter 14:44.  It states, "Nevertheless, in their presumption they went up toward the high hill country, though neither Moses nor the ark of the Lord's covenant moved from the camp." This makes sense if you have knowledge and understanding of the ark of the Lord's covenant.

The word presumption means: A conclusion made as to the existence or nonexistence of a fact that must be drawn from other evidence that is admitted and proven to be true. It also means:  Behavior or attitude that is boldly arrogant or offensive;  Behavior or attitude that is boldly arrogant or offensive; effrontery: :

In other word proceeding and making decisions independently of God, not based on fact or certainty is not wise.

It also means: PRESUMPTION 1 : presumptuous attitude or conduct : audacity 2 a : an attitude or belief dictated by probability:

The people of God in this story moved independently of God. They move based on presumptions. And,  you know whenever you make uncertain decisions things usually go in the wrong direction, as it did in this story.

Listen, when it comes to making a decision, and you don't know which way to go, then do nothing until you hear and understand the direction God is leading you. God states in His word " And you shall seek me and fine me, when you search for me with all your heart." (Jeremiah 29:11-13) ... His word also says, "Call unto me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know." (Jeremiah 33:3). Trust can sometimes be difficult. But, circumstances  becomes more difficult when we make decisions independently of God!

Therefore, trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your heart.

~I hope this made sense ... These are my thoughts along with the word of God~

~The Truth About Change~

Be Free and Fly High ... You only live once!

I believe with true change, there is true freedom. And, the most important kind of freedom is to be who and what you truly are. Most of us trade in who we are and pick up a role. We prefer to be actors and actresses. We give up our ability to feel, to truly feel, and put on a mask of disguise.  we fail to realize that there could never be a real revolution in us or around us until there is a personal revolution, on a personal level.

When I speak of revolution it indicates war. Well, I'm speaking of war in the aspect of you taking control of who you are and understanding that you have control over what you do, what you say, how you feel, and in most instances of how you look. It is imperative that you understand that change can be a good thing. True Change must began in your heart and mind. This war will be lost without your leaning and depending on the Power of God in your life.

You must change your thought process of who you are and understand and acknowledge who's you are.

Revolution's mission is to give you more choices, control and convenience in important aspects of your life. Thus the building process begins.

It must happen inside FIRST!!! That being said. Sometimes it takes a good fall, hurt, or loss to know where we are. It shouldn't happen this way, but sometimes this is the only way we will see.

Wouldn't your life be different if you stopped worrying about things you can't control and start focusing on things you can? Let today be the day that you free yourself from fruitless worry, take control of the day and take positive action on things you can change.

Believe me, there is a beauty in truth and change, even if it is painful. Once the pain subsides, we take a deep breath, look towards heaven, we will see the beauty in that particular change, though it may have been painful, there is a rainbow at the end!

Lets change from lying to ourselves or others.  The reason I say this is because we fail to realize that lies strengthens our defects. A lie does not teach, help, fix or cure anything. Neither does a lie develop a person's character, a person's mind, a person's heart, nor his or her soul.

I've lived long enough to know and understand that change is not always pleasant, nor is it easy. But change is constant. It is continual. I am convinced that the only way you can grow Mentally, Emotionally, Spiritually is to embrace positive change taking place in your life.

Once you allow the change of truth or the truth of change to take over; however you choose to phrase this, you will see a world that you have never seem before. You will see friends and love ones in ways you have never seem them before. And more importantly, we will see you as the person God meant for you to truly be.

Life can be long or it could be short. Nonetheless, You must choose to live as if today is your last. Not in a panic mode, but relaxed and joyous. Life, relationships, and circumstances are forever and always changing. So, you'd better make every minute count. You need to decide how you want your life to be and live it. If your life were to end today, the way it is now, is this the way you want to live it?

Listen: Speak with integrity, don't take everything personally, always do your best and find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really, truly  want!

Be gentle with yourself and learn to truly love and respect you.

Live truth, walk your walk. Express love, share enthusiasm, move towards your dreams. Dance and sing to your own music, and no one else's. Embrace the blessings and gifts that God has given you.

Make This Day Worth Remembering!

~BE FREE~

~These are my thoughts ... I welcome yours~ and your Comments.

~The person behind the Mask~

~Sometimes we are embarrassed to show who we truly are~

~And, sometimes we prefer the mask~

All of us wear masks to be sociable. We put it on, go into the mainstream and try to impress people by putting on the best image of ourselves we can muster up. However, behind every mask is the real you, who you truly are and what you are capable of doing.

I realize that mysteries keep people away or impresses their curiosity to bring them closer to you. The life of smoke and mirrors can be a burdensome life and a great disguise. Now that doesn't mean it is good.

We disguise ourselves from others and oftentimes this is done to make us feel comfortable within ourselves. Sometimes this is done if we feel inadequate. This methodology can go on  for so long until we become a disguise even to ourselves. Or we may realize who we are and simply hide our true self.  Truth be told, all of us hide or have hidden our true self at some point in time.

There was an article on an Atlanta news channel that showed a clean cut young man, well dressed, decent, intelligent and seemed to have his life in order. He met a young lady on a dating website. They met in a public place, had drinks. When the young lady awakened, she didn't know how she got to where she was. She noticed that many of her personal belongings were missing. Including one major personal belonging such as her underwear.

Yes, she was sexually assaulted and didn't know it. The police were able to track him down based on emails and phone records. They linked him to the sexual assault based on DNA that was found in her body.

Women, please be careful about meeting strangers on Dating Websites. Whom God has for you, is for you. So be patient. I'm aware that sometime you get lonely and you may even feel desperate, but be patient. Place yourself on the path that God has ordained for you and I promise you this; that special man for you will be on the same road looking for you. Men, same advice.


Moving forward, We think we know people. People think they know us. We think that what we see is real and hard to believe because of what we see and how good it looks and sound. We almost never ask ourselves is he/she or wearing a mask. Are they truly who they appear to be?

Some wear makeup to enhance beauty or to cover up wrinkles and or scars. Some dress to to get your attention. We wear deodorants, perfumes and colognes to mask odors to the point that others come to know us by those scents.

How strange it is. We hide deep lingering secrets about ourselves, from the people we love and from strangers we've met. Yet, somehow we manage to function carrying the awesome burden of living behind a mask. I believe many of us are afraid to be who we truly are. And that's not good. We have mask ourselves for so long until we don't know another way, except to continue in that path.

Listen, I'm using the term makeup as a metaphor. There is nothing wrong with wearing makeup or dressing nice women. So, please don't take what I'm saying out of context. I'm speaking on matters of heart and mind.

I'm saying, Just Be Real. Be Your True Self. You will come to love you. and if someone can't accept you for you who truly are, then say good-bye! ...  Don't be afraid of being you. Now, if your true self is a bad person, dishonest, ETC. The seek to change who you are. And FAST!

I hope this writing makes sense...

~These are my thoughts ... I welcome yours~

~I believe that everything happens for a reason~

Life to many can sometimes be an abstract picture.  And, it's meaning or purpose can be so unclear. In life things go wrong and none of us enjoy dealing with life's issues. But, as long as we live there will be life's issues to deal with.

Moving forward, I believe that everything happens for a reason. I believe People grow and change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they are right, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.

Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there. They serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or help you figure out who you are or who you want to become and help steer you in the the direction you should go.

Most times you may or may not know these people. They may be; a neighbor, family member, a friend who has re-entered your life or even a complete stranger who, when your eyes lock into theirs, you know at that very moment that they will affect your life in some positive, profound way. 

And, for some reason, you hold on to them.

Sometimes things happen. And, those things can seem to be so horrible, painful and unfair. But, when you reflect and really start to look back, you realize that without overcoming those tragedies and obstacles, you would never have realized your potential, strength and will power of your heart.

Simply stated: Eventually all things fall into place. So live for every moment, and know that "EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON".

Know what you want, so when it comes your way you will have the sense to grab it. Take a step and amaze yourself. Let no one define who you are, except you. Realize this is your life and like it. Always be real.

Please remember this: It is never to late to be what you might have been... God has a way of guiding you into the direction He wants to to go. Never question His methods. For His methods are to  strengthen you for the next phase of your life.

~These are my thoughts, I welcome yours~